A Little Sweetness....

Oh my! We have been so blessed! How did we get two of the most amazing little friends to share our lives with? I love the annual Christmas "sleepy time" pics. No...they are not asleep but aren't they cute! (Sorry about Nikko. He would not listen when we gave the command "sleep". Hopefully this coming year with Mister being home (YES I SAID HOME!!!) and some 4H work, next year will go a tad bit smoother. We shall see......) Aren't they cutie putooties? We kindof like them.......

Catch Up Mail Call

Dear T-Bug and Aly Cat,

You are the best! We love having you with us. We love watching you be altogether, seeing you grow up and take care of each other. I love hearing the laughter and teasing but most of all, I HEART seeing you help each other and be there one another. Never forget that family is forever and will support you no matter what. I promise that is all we have sometimes.

Dear Santa,

I. Do. Believe. (That is all!)

Dear Far Away Family,

You were missed a great deal over Christmas this year. The distance is just much too far for all of us to maintain the involvement that is properly needed for us. Did you feel love sent your way? Did you know you were missed? Let's figure out a new plan. This one is simply not working.

Dear Sweet Biz,

Makeup? Waver? 389 page books? Big girl boots? ReAlLy?!?!?!?! Where did the time go? Where did my little girl go? Your dad and I had a hard time shopping for you this year. Yes, some tears were shed. To realize you are growing up makes us long for the old days but still we are excited about the future at the same time. We heart you forever and 500 million Swedish fish added on top of that. Our little family is blessed because we have you! Please remember to always be you and know that the other things are fun but it is what is inside that really matters. We love your heart and your smile! We love the way you think of others and ways to help. Thanks for being my little girl and teaching me to listen with my heart and pay attention to the small details.

Dear Friends and Family,

L.O.V.E.D reading your cards and letters!!!! Wow! You are splendid and as busy as we are! The fact that you included us on your list touched our hearts. We read and reread each and everyone one of them. Nice job in the past year with all of your adventures! Please keep us updated as the new year progresses. (Oh, and if you were still searching the mail box for ours.....I promise it will be coming soon! It just maybe more of a "New Year" card than Christmas.)

Dear Little Man,

You are a teenager now. We aren't sure what that means but we have loved every minute we have had thus far with you. Thirteen years ago, you were one of the best presents I could have ever dreamed of. We were so scared and unsure of ourselves but you have helped us through each stage. We are so blessed to be your parents. Your ambition and drive not only amaze me but inspire me. We enjoyed your party with your friends. It was fun to watch you be a kid and not the old sole you can be at times. Remember to slow down once in a while and just enjoy the stillness that life can offer you. You can learn in quiet times too!

Dear Snow,

Where are you? We are longing to see you and ski! If it is going to be cold, we need you to join us! Come on. It is okay. We are waiting and will be happy with your arrival. Promise.

Dear Boise State Seniors,

Thanks for the ride boys. We miss you already and can't believe our 4 years together are over. Don't worry about the young ins'. We promise to love and support them in your absence. You will always be missed and thought of however. Best Wishes in your lives ahead. Be wise and smart as Coach Pete has taught you and you will continue to do great things. Keep Believing! We will. Scouts Honor.

Dear Mister,

Having you home has been like Heaven on earth. I heart you. You are my best friend and the Daddy my little ones need because without you, I am not me. I need you as well. How do you make things better with one smile and eye wink? I want to be like that. Thanks for loving me and making my dreams come true every minute you are with me. You make this journey worthwhile and have meaning.

Dear Aquarium,

Ahhhhhhhh, you have no idea how long we have waited for you. You can bring a small piece of that ocean close to home and I need that! Keep up the great work and try to speed up the seal and otter exhibit. That would be the best!

Dear Blog,

Sorry. Time has gone rather quickly. I suppose you can be a New Year's resolution to keep up. I will try to visit you more often.

Life Lessons

I am a blog stalker. Well, when I have time. Well, actually when I can steal a moment away from our busy little family. It is good for me to do. I worked out (Day 2!!! Wahoozie! On a roll, I tell ya!) and decided to catch up on some reading. Blog reading, that is. I always feel a little smile in my heart when I get to see how amazing life truly is when I read about friends and some I shamelessly stalk but do not really know, internet friends. (Would you call them imaginary?) Life. Is. Good. It is in the small things that we don't stop to look at in our busy schedules, but all in all, life is good and we are blessed. My focus shouldn't be on Mister leaving this morning, friends of both our children and us not saying or doing the right things and causing hurt, money being tight, work hardships and the list goes on. It should be on how amazing our little family is and how we are so very blessed to be together. Because that is all that matters! So I borrowed/stole/took without permission this from an amazing blog (Written by an amazing lady!) this morning to help me remember. Life is going to be okay. I will keep praying and loving and in the special quiet mornings like today, I can smile and remember what life is all about learn a little about where my focus should be, whether I am the cheerleader, the tackler or the one being tackled!1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else. 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion... Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
Have a most stupendous day! I plan on it!

Mister. I. heart. you.

Fifteen years ago, I got to say I do to a lifetime of happiness with my best friend. How lucky am I? Not only can Mister read and write, he is truly a wonderful man inside and out. I still cannot believe he asked me. He. asked. me. Wow! So in honor of our fabulous, most splendid 15 years together...here is a look back. 1) bought our first home 2)welcomed the Little Man into our lives 3)learned how to love on a very special Lil' Bit 4)built a house (Still have TONS to do and finish. Anyone want to help 5)became Aunt's and Uncles to some very special nieces and nephews 6)enjoyed family and friends (Some that have moved (Boo!) and some that are still as close as ever! (Yay!) 7)learned how to be parents at dance, gymnastics, soccer, cheer, Judo, 4H, football, quizzing, wrestling and track events 8)watched our favorite Boys in Blue and Orange play in AND win games never thought possible 9)became health conscious and one of us started running in races. (Eek! I know, everyone knows it isn't me but kudos to Mister for losing close to 150 lbs. Maybe me someday...just maybe!)10)became proud owners of two black labs and one very large yellow lab, two turtles, and a crazy amount of fish! 11)moved around in our employment, changed titles, positions and locations 11)started skiing both on the water and in the snow as a family 12)enjoyed motorcycles, 4 Wheelers, boating, snowmobiling, mtn. biking, camping and now our new doom buggy 13)enjoyed trips to Mexico, Las Vegas, Washington (Love you Westfall's!), several places in Idaho, Disneyland and of course the beach 14) learned how to heart each other more each day 15)continue to dream about what is to come.

Mister. I. Heart. You. To. The. Moon. And. Beyond. Forever.

A few things I have learned lately.....

I am amazed by my little family and all they do and accomplish on a daily basis.

Getting older isn't as bad as I thought.

I can, and indeed do, love Mister more now than I did 16 years ago.

Life at this moment of time is really the only thing that matters. Not the past, nor what will happen in the future is of utmost importance. Worrying, wishing and wondering are all silly wastes of precious moments.

Summer months go by way too fast and are way too hot.

Saying goodbye to the Little Man for DU (Destination Unknown) was a very hard thing to do.

Mister is the hardest working man in the whole world and I heart him more than he will ever know.

Sometimes there is nothing you can do but say "I love you and I am here."

I want to live in a world full of people that like to laugh and think of others before speaking. Enough with judgmental, full of themselves people on this planet.

Summer School is a lot of work for a small period of time.

Having 1500 thread count sheets really does make a difference and how I do love them.

I am growing up. I really kinda like it.

Having your family live in another state is getting way to hard on me. I miss them.

We have been so very blessed in so many ways. Sometimes we forget.

The people that you find are the best to work with and love, will eventually move/leave.

I need to get to spinning more often and workout on the days when I don't.

Seasons without football are just boring.

I like winter so much better than summer. I am just not a "hot" weather type of girl.

God will always be there but you won't always have easy days.

July Mail Call

Dear The Voice, Wow! I. am. hooked. I loved it! I wept with you, sang with you, danced with you and even voted. Dia, you are the winner in my book but you have Mr. Blake taking care of you now, so you will be okay. Adam..... Wow. What a fine, kind hearted specimen you are. Thanks for being so entertaining. I can't wait until you come back. TV isn't worth watching.

Dear Beach, My heart is still there with you. Nothing ever seems quite the same when returning. I know you are there and I know I should be there with you. I should see my dogs running up and down in your sandy water. I should see my kids jumping and playing in the waves. I should see Mister sitting next to me and holding my hand as the sun sets. Yes, a piece of my heart is still there, it always is.

Dear Momma, Have I told you how simply wonderful you are? I can't imagine a better role model for me and my family. You make me laugh, crazy, think and want to be a better person. Who would have thought that 20 years ago.?!??! I admire you in more ways than I could ever write or describe. For lack of better words that truly represent the gratification you deserve, thank you. Thank you for being you. Thank you for loving us, no matter what. Thank you for being there, for guiding and coaching us every step but allowing us to find our own way. You. are. loved.

Dear Biz, You have had quite a week little one. You won the coloring contest and tickets for us to go to the water park. Thanks for wanting your daddy and I to go along. You woke up at 5 to work at your new volunteer project. I am so proud of you! That is not something just any 10 year old would do. You have a big heart precious girl. Don't forget to keep it!!! Remember to smile and love always. No matter what.Dear Linda, Spinning kicked my hiney and my legs and part of my upper body today. I do not believe a woman should sweat like that. But you keep going and still manage to look like some type of biking goddess up there. How does that happen? How do you do that? I enjoy it though. It makes me feel like I have really accomplished something. Thank you.

Dear Little Brother and Family, It has been forever since we last talked. I hate to be a pest but a week is way too long to not receive a picture and/or chat about the things that are happening in our lives. That helps you seem closer somehow. I can't wait for Sept.!!!

Dear Mister, You are on your way home. I can't be happier. When I hear you are on the road coming home to me, my heart jumps and swirls like I just got off a roller coaster. You get to stay home all next week. Yes. It will be fun times promise. Thanks for date night last week. It was fun to be young and carefree again. Crazy how old we have become, isn't it? Thank you for being an amazing man with so much to offer to me. You are all of the songs I love and the ones that haven't been written yet. i heart you.

Dear Nikko, Please. Listen to the dog lady. She is here to make things easier on you, and us. We love you but do not like your disobedience. How can you be so cute and naughty at the same blessed time? What a talent you have for that.
Dear Favorite Sister and Family, You are so silly. I still cannot believe what you did to our yard. Thank for making my birthday special. It was simply perfect and just what I wanted without asking. I felt loved and honored all day. Our time on the boat was fabulous as well! Sorry about the embarrising moment and forgetting the hat and glasses were on. Oops! We all enjoy you and love every minute with you crazy people. Fun, fun times and lots of giggles. Always.

Dear MTI Class, You almost killed me! You made me so frustrated that I couldn't even speak. RRRRRRR. However, why do I still keep thinking and talking about math? This is not normal. I am sure that is due to you. However, I will always say that having the right answer is most important. Ask Mister when he does the checkbook. He wants me to have the right answer no matter how I arrived at it! That is all I have to say about that, well and maybe that I LOVE subitizing. I just like to say that word.

Dear Little Man, What is up with your nose and allergies? You are making me sad hearing you and watching you try to breath. Poor thing! Thank you for getting up with me and going to spinning. I love our time together there. I love to watch you push yourself and see how much determination you have. You amaze me with your tenacity. You are a special Little Man and we are blessed to have you in our lives.

Dear Me, You have options. You are quite capable. You can and have the ability to change things and show love. Hang in there. No matter what others say, your heart is in the right place. Learn to be patient and observe. Talking doesn't always resolve things. Listen...

I Love You This Much Because....

...you are a helper...you volunteer on your birthday, doing a thankless job that will help so many people you will never meet...you can light up the room when you choose to really smile...you like to snuggle...you can laugh at the Hill of Doom and know we will attack it together again someday soon...you are a perfectly amazing reader and enjoy getting lost in books. I do too...you are ridiculously cute and witty...you love school and all of the simple things of school like a perfect pencil with a brand new eraser and a perfectly sharpened tip...you miss your Daddy and love him as much as I do...you draw on anything available, the dog's collar, the walls and every scrap of paper we have left in our house...you understand the importance of family and how precious time with them can be...you really do care about others and you hurt when they hurt...you love your brother and appreciate the importance of the life long friend you have in him...you ALWAYS come and give me a kiss goodnight and promise to meet me at the beach we so dearly love...you laugh at my silly Japanese and help me learn more...you sing...you always remember to say I love you and sometimes do it first...you love all of us, no matter what we say or where we drag you, You love us back!
I just heart you Biz and always will. Ten years ago we were blessed to meet you and welcome you into our little family. Thank you for being the girl that you are and being the extra special, girlie, part of us. I love you forever baby girl, all the way to the moon and back down again 500 million times.

HaPpY bIrThDaY!

KIDNAPPING OUR SON....WHAT!?!??!?!

Our Little Man is now considered to be in the 7th grade. (Yes, I know that school just got out but this is what happens in our world now. There is no waiting. They rush them into one grade and then POOF....done with that, you have now reached a new level, move on please. Don't blink!) This also means, in our Nazarene world, Youth Group!! Are you kidding me? Wasn't he just born like yesterday or possibly last week? YIKES! (I am feeling quite old and a little nostalgic about all things past....sniff, sniff.) Last week, I was a big girl and Mommy of the Year, if I do say so myself, and headed to the "official" parent meeting. No kids allowed, just adults to fill us in on what the youth group is and what will take place to encourage our Little Man to be an active part in our church. And so this is how it begins.... (For those of you like me in the dark and wishing the event of your little baby, the one that relied on you for all things, turning into that dreaded teenager and being accepted into the youth group.) 1. Your son (or daughter if this is informational to you) will receive postcards from various kids introducing themselves and telling how excited they are for your child to be coming up into the youth group. *Check, so far, so good. I can handle this. Great idea! Kuddos to you Mr. Youth Pastor! Love it.
2. On Wednesday, a group of kids (All current youth group members) will come to your house to deliver a video to your child. You are to be home, answer the door and then encourage your child to watch part, ONLY PART, of the video on that day. Oh, and then remind them to come to church for Youth on the Lawn taking place that night.**Check, Check. Again, kids coming and encouraging sounds perfect! Splendid! Hum, wait a minute. Only watch part of the video and then you are suppose to stop. (I can't even wait for Christmas and those packages are wrapped and put away. A video on the other hand can accidentally keep going. What if I am too lazy to get off the couch to push stop? What if I hit the wrong button and actually fast foward? .....WAIT?!?!? ReAlLy?!??!

3. Thursday, more video.

***Check and Double Check. Yay! I needed closure! Oops, sorry WE needed closure. It is all good. The video is about Ultimate Frisbee (Apparently something kids do these days and really does sound like a lot of fun!) and an invitation for your child to come and play. Then a scrumptious Wendy's lunch after. (Oh by the way, parents are not invited!) Super. Little Man likes being outside, likes playing games and guess what? LOVES food! So far, so good. Lovin' the Youth Group!

4. Saturday...Don't tell your child but a group of boys (Thank goodness! No girls are headed into my Little Man's room! ) will sneak into your house at an insane time (6:45 AM to be exact! No worries we were up. Mister left for McCall to run a race. Oh the joys of never getting to sleep in!) and rip your child out of bed and whisk them away. Kidnapping/Stealing/Taking, pretty much all the same words if you ask me, your child until 4 o'clock when you can go and pick them up. (Smart youth pastor!)

****Check, Check, Check and Check. Our sweet Little Man sleeping soundly, cozy in his bed. BAM!!! Boys in masks and a youth pastor, run in and wake the poor kid up and say, "Get up! We are headed to breakfast!" (Check out Jon's hand in utter confusion. He was silent. I am thinking maybe I should have them wake him up every day. I usually get a lot of whining and not a lot of movement!)

If that doesn't welcome you into a group, I really do not know what would. All in all, so very impressed. Needless to say, our boy has done something either at the church, or with the church group for the last three days and we couldn't be happier. That is a great start and a very warm welcome! Kuddo's Mr. Youth Pastor and gang! You are a breath of fresh air! Last thing to be said, Welcome to the Youth Group Little Man! Our hope and dreams are for you to grow and learn to rely on God in everything you do, all the while establishing good relationships!

We heart you to the moon and and back again.

Some news about Love Languages.

So I took a quiz! See, I can never escape school. First day out and I take a quiz! Geez.
That. Is. Sad.


Anyhoo....back to the quiz. It was about Love Languages and what Love Language speaks to you best. (Pay attention Mister!) So...I had to choose between two different statements which one I felt resembled my needs (It is about time someone asked or cared or bothered!!! Oh wait, I took the quiz. No one really wanted to know) the most. And guess what? Turns out that I am not at all like my fabulous brother and niece who share the same Love Language (Even though they both claim it is not of truth in any shape or form!) -Gifts (The need to recieve gifts. I know. I hear you. I try.) My Love Language is........



wait for it.......

here the big reveal comes......

The need for quality time.

Enough said. Come over! Let's spend some time. Apparently I need it. I really do!

Ask me.....

If you ask me....

Mean people stink. There is no reason to be mean just for the sake of being mean. Come on people!

If you ask me...

I was able to take some most bea-U-ti-Ful hikes in the mountians with the dogs and the family.

Oh, how I do heart our little family!

If you ask me..

Twin Falls is much too far away and yet the map assures me it is just 1 1/2 hours away. I miss your face Mister and the kids/dogs just cannot cuddle the right way!!

If you ask me...

Motorbikes are scary! Oh my! Please be careful my boys. I heart you WAY too much!

If you ask me..
Biz rocked it on the 4-Wheeler this past weekend! Go Lil' Bit GO!

If you ask me....

This year was much too hard on me physically, professionally and psychologically.Here is to a New Year. It is going to be great!

If you ask me...

Kindergarten is the best grade ever to teach and my 5-6 year old kiddo's tend to behave better than some adults I know.

If you ask me..

When there is someone that you love (family and friends) and they do not live close, things seem out of order.

If you ask me...

I heart Mister so much that I cannot put it into words! I. am. blessed.

If you ask me...

Our Little Man and Biz are the coolest kids around and surprise us daily by who they are and the glimpses of the big people they are becoming. (Sniff, sniff and hooray all at one time!!!)

If you ask me...

I need to figure out a way to become motivated again and get to the gym. Ideas?!??!

If you ask me...

Yes, I would love some chocolate. I always want chocolate. (See out of control!)

If you ask me...

My goal of trying a new recipe each and every week this summer, is a most stupendous idea!

Anything else you want to ask me? Go ahead, Shoot.....

Mail Call...

Dear Boys of Mine,
I am so glad you are here on this planet with me! You make me smile and laugh and a little crazy but it is good. So very good.

Dear Little Girl,
You have the world at your disposal. Remember to be sweet and kind of everyone. Just because girls are known to be the meanest ever, don't be like them. Love everyone and always show your very sweet smile. Things are going to be okay. Promise. Because through it all, you will always have us!

Dear Mister,
Can you please, pretty please, go and buy the biggest stock pile of Skinny Cow's? I am seriously over-worked and stressed at this point. When you are gone, it is the only thing that can perk me up.

Dear Family and Friends,
I absolutely LOVED spending a night of trying on flip flops. It was a wonderful evening and one that we will do on my planet daily. Thank you. Loves, hugs and hearts all around.

Dear Far Away Friend,
LOVED chatting with you on Friday. You are an inspiration to keep going and a friend I can always count on. Thank you for being you and even across the miles, still being there. I miss you and heart you forever.

Dear Planet,
It is time we all come to live. (Well, the nice people anyway!) Are you ready? I am not sure I can't take the meanness of this big, bad earth anymore. Be prepared!

Dear Twin Falls,
Remember to send back my Mister as quickly as possible. Monday night would be great as I am completely concerned about taking the puppy to 4H. Wednesday night, I am completely saddened that the BIG youth group wants to have a meeting about our Little Man. Thursday, Mister has a date with the Oregon Trail and Biz. Let's just be honest, I need him every day of every week. So Twin, I am sorry, you need to let Mister come home now!

Dear Great Potato Race,
Thanks for not hurting Mister to badly. However, why do I feel the need to feel fat and lazy when I go to be pit crew there? Hum...

Dear Photos of Me,
Please stop being so brutally honest. I know I am getting older, but you don't have to be so very revealing of my every flaw.

Dear Miracle Boy,
My heart misses you, your voice, your cute little personality, your laugh and smile. Please come back soon. You are much too far away!

Dear Self,
You are a rockstar and nothing can stop you, but you. Hang in there. Give it all you have got.

WeDnEsDaY iN nUmBeRs.

540~ miles that separate me from a family of three that I love and miss so very much. Included in these miles, is a humongous mountain range and one massive river!
126~ miles is the distance between the man I heart forever and our house. TOO FAR!
20~ Kindergarten kids that sang their graduation songs and made my eyes water.

5~ students from Middle School that joined our Little Man in receiving the Young Citizenship award.
3~ miles I didn't, but should have ran this morning.

2~ proud parents of THE secretary of her 4H group and a Young Citizenship Award winner .
1~ Mister who drove all the way from work to join us in celebrating said Little Man's award luncheon. (How I love this man!)
0~ skinny cows because we are out. (sniff, sniff)
Wednesday wiped me out! How was your day?

and so it begins.................

spring break 2011....

~flat tire departing from work on Friday. Yup, that is right. With brand new (not even 2 months old...however, they have hit a deer) tires, I manage to get a flat. Ugh! Thanks Mister for rescuing me! You are the man of my dreams, and car repair.

~flat tire on bike. Double ugh! Thanks again Mister....refer back to my dream statement.

~gaining 4 pounds back! Triple ugh and yuck and all the feelings that go with it. WHY?!?!? That is all I have to say about that! why.......

~Mom and gang left for the beach. without me. ReAlLy? I can't even respond.

~Only the boys got to go skiing yesterday because Biz was having a break down and needed to go shopping. (Really, shopping. Fun times let me tell you!) Just for the record, I lost rock, paper, scissors. However, life is good when you take a look at these things.

yes... life is good and going to be okay!

Whoa.....our Little Man did that?

Apparently this is what happens when you explain to our Little Man not to worry about being perfect and just to go out there and scrap.....

Not exactly sure I like it when other little guys are "scrapping" on my boy, but it sure does make a Momma proud when she sees her Little Man do a little of his own! Love that boy!

(No worries. No one was hurt in the making of this film. Sillies! Noone ever gets hurt in Judo....)

I Heart You!

Mister,

I love that you like to do Judo and try to learn my "special" Japanese words.

I love that you watch smut TV with me, even at strange hours and laugh right beside me. Even though we know it is just that, smut.

I love that you listen to me when I need to talk about stupid and silly girl drama that truly has nothing to do with my work but seems to always be there.

I love that you will stick around through the hard times. Because you always do and I know in my heart you always will.

I love the man you are and the man that I can see you becoming.

I love watching you listen to our kids and the way you explain things to them so much better than myself.

I love when I see you tuck them in at night when you don't think I am paying attention. My heart swells to sizes I didn't know was possible. I love the Daddy you are.

I love that you can make a joke when I am totally being serious and we both end up laughing.

I love that you understand my constant need for Skinny Cow's to be in the freezer.

I love that you cared I needed help vacuuming.

I love that you keep asking me if I went to the gym but don't criticize when I don't.

I love that you listen to my work stories and even though you have no clue who I am talking about, you laugh when it is funny to me, you hold my hand when I cry, you ask about all of them because you know how much I love them and the big part of my life they become every year. Then you hold me when it is time for me to say goodbye each and every year and smile because you know I will do the same thing all over again in the fall.

I love that you laugh at me when I worry about our kids, about money, about my students, about our families, about life.

Mostly, I just heart you forever and way beyond the moon.

Thanks for being my world!

D-

(I miss your face as usual! Hurry home!)

Mail Call.

Dear Sunday,
Why do you take the weekend from us and why do you always arrive so quickly? Take your time. We really won't mind!

Dear Ippon Judo,
Wow!

Dear Cabin,
We love you. The end.

Dear Treadmill,
I beat you down today! No inhaler, no stopping and finished the 5 miles. Take that! I shall celebrate with a Skinny Cow in your honor.

Dear Little Man,
You are the best Judoka out there. One thing I want you to remember, with all of my intensive Judo training. Relax. When it is practice, work on that "perfect" throw but at tournaments my son, become a scrapper! We are proud of you either way. The two are different and need different applications. Learn from the scrappers.

Dear Biz,
Isn't it great that Judo weekends become Mommy and Me weekends? I learned how to french braid. What could be better than that little one? I know they are long for you but I enjoy our chats while we are at them and there are always funny things to watch. So it is good for us to giggle at. Not so bad, not so bad!

Dear Boy who Posted (and didn't take the fall),
Don't do that again. That was gross, sad and scary all at the same time. DON'T DO IT, TAKE THE FALL!!!!! Yuck!

Dear Mister,
It is Sunday. We had the weekend. I heart you forever and more than all the Ippons that Ippon Judo gave this weekend and in all of their little careers out there on any mat. Thank you for coaching our Little Man. I know you get frustrated but remember that being out on the mat by yourself is different than watching it happen. Our Little Man is amazing because of you. I will miss your face this week and there will be bad hole on your side of the bed. Hurry home. Be safe.

Dear Deer that Hit Our Car,
Bad decision. However, I was quite happy to not see you dead on the side of the road this weekend. My happy thought is you are with your family telling the story from a different perspective than we had. Again, Bad Decision. Cars are made out of metal. Enough said.

Dear Friends that Entertained Me and Coached My Little Man,
Thank you. The weekend was perfect because of you. Thank you for being you. Thank you for sharing in the life of our family. We enjoyed you. I enjoyed you!

Dear Family/Friends that Couldn't Come,
We missed you. Our hearts were sad. Come back. Come back to this crazy Judo schedule. Your absences were greatly felt and we missed you more than words can say.

Dear Teacher Friend in Colorado,
My heart and my profession is not the same without you in it! I miss you! I miss your crazy food smells! Can you come back?

Dear Away Family,
Life isn't the same when sharing it on the phone. This has to end. Who is going to make the move?

Back on the Wagon.....Well, deciding to buy a ticket on the love train?!??!!

As I woke up this morning at FOUR O'CLOCK (I really do love you, Mister! It is my day off!!!) just to go to the gym together before headed out on his weekly "this is what we have to do right now." journey, I realized that we have started to be in a complacent and unpleasant weekend rut. I moan about his absence all week and then when he is home on the weekend, I catch myself in my silly, pity party about how much I do (So true!), how overworked I am (Completely unfair!), how unbelievable tired I am (I am sure due to the overwork!), and frankly just about life in general. Can I get an AMEN?!??!?! Then I began to realize how completely "un-fun", "un-pleasant", and just quite frankly "un-sexy" my attitude must be for the poor man gone all week.

Let me give you a typical Sunday evening scenario.
Mister and I get home from the gym. Mister is complaining about the new church time. I am tired of hearing about this time wondering how he feels I can change the situation. Now I am angry because already my attempt at being a better Christian has changed due to said conversation. Mister and I discuss dinner options. ("What do you want for dinner?" "I don't care, what do you want?" Question proposed to Little Man and Biz, "What would you like for dinner?" "We don't care." "How about taco's?" "No, we don't want that?" "What then?" "We don't care, really." Hum...see the pattern?This goes on for literally minutes.) So I cook dinner. I beg and plead with said Children and Mister to clean up the kitchen. Mister and Children pick up kitchen while Mom/Wife/ME does the laundry and packs Misters suitcase. Then I go behind Mister and Children to clean the kitchen again. Mister asks me, "What's wrong?" I say, "Nothing. It is fine." Mister says "OK." I internally curse at Mister for not wiping the counters, unloading the dishwasher, and oh ya, by the way, why am I required to do all the laundry? Mister sits down and rough houses with the children completely unaware of my internal monologue. Mister asks me, "Ready to go to bed?" Finally I have had enough and I explode, "Why do you not do anything around here?!?!?" Mister...."Um, what did I do this time?" I realize I have overreacted.......again. Mister sighs and ultimately forgives me....once again.

Does this happen to you or am I the only crazy Wife/Mom on this Earth? Our schedules can make it so difficult not to focus on the smallest of things sometimes and today I realized that if I can write this event down verbatim, that it possibly happens WAY to often in our house. I need to learn from our Sunday evening ritual so I won't beat myself up about it all week just to do it again before Mister leaves. Wouldn't that be freeing? To just learn and stop the madness? How does that quote go, "Doing the same thing will only create the same results." or something like that. So right now, I proclaim to the blogiverse, I am going to rededicate myself (and the Mister, but he doesn't know it yet!) to treating our marriage and family time like what it is and should be...at the risk of sounding all disco...ish, We Are FAMILY! Sometimes, when you've been together as long as we have, maybe it is normal to be more like roommates than Husband and Wife. Then add kids to the mix and maybe, just maybe we get lost.....
NO MORE I SAY!
So, today my focus is on our marriage and the vows we made many moons ago. Wish me luck!!!

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